Hello, friends. It is March, which means the madness is upon us. If you’re new around here, welcome. This is what I do in March.
Each year, we have a contest and the winner receives a $30 Amazon gift card! It’s a huge deal. The link to enter will be at the bottom of this post.
But first, the moment you’ve all been waiting for in order to fill out your brackets … my March Madness Bracket Strategy. aka every thought I have while filling out my bracket.
Here we go!
Kentucky vs. Hampton/Manhattan – Kentucky. This is such a no-brainer. First of all, Kentucky has won, like, every game this year. Second of all, who in the Hamptons/Manhattan is playing basketball? This isn’t the lacrosse tournament.
[Wait. Why does it say Louisville on the side? And then Columbus below that? Did these teams already win? Oh, maybe this is where they're playing. That must be it.]
Cincinatti vs. Purdue – Purdue. No reason.
West Virginia vs. Buffalo – West Virginia. They’re rated 5, they’ve been here before.
Maryland vs. Valparaiso – [Googles Valparaiso.] It’s in Indiana. And it has a fun name, but it’s rated 13 next to Maryland’s 4. Eh, Maryland.
Butler vs. Texas – Butler. I see them here a lot.
Notre Dame vs. Northeastern – Notre Dame. They’re pretty good at sports in general, I think.
Wichita State vs. Indiana – Wichita. I think Kansas is generally good at basketball.
Kansas vs. New Mexico – Kansas, see above.
Wisconson vs. Coastal Caro. – I’m assuming that Caro. stands for Carolina. Wisconsin is rated 1, otherwise I’d totally go with Coastal Caro just because it sounds cool.
Oregon vs. Oklahoma State – Oregon. [Googles SuperBowl because I was thinking Seattle was in Oregon because I always get those mixed up and I was going to say Oregon was on a roll this year but then realized Seattle didn't even win and it's not in Oregon and therefore all this is pointless, but I'm still going with Oregon.]
Arkansas vs. Wofford – Wofford, I’ve never heard of you. Welcome to the NCAA Tournament. Sorry Arkansas will beat you.
North Carolina vs. Harvard – Listen, I like Harvard. And they had that whole Cinderella thing a couple of years ago and it was super exciting. But they’re up against North Carolina. They have blue in their school colors. And everyone knows blue = basketball success. Plus, NC is typically good at basketball. So, North Carolina, as much as it pains me.
Xavier vs. BYU/Ole Miss – Xavier. They’re always in this, so I figure they must be pretty good.
Baylor vs. Georgia State – Look at you, Baylor. Ranked #3. Way to go.
VCU vs. Ohio State – I never remember what VCU stands for. [Googles VCU] VIRGINIA COMMONWEALTH. We’ll go with them.
Arizona vs. Texas Southern – Arizona.
Villanova vs. Lafayette – Villanova, always.
North Carolina State vs. LSU – Y’all, I googled NC State and their mascots names are Mr. and Ms. Wuf and something called “Tuffy.” I’m going with LSU.
UNI vs. Wyoming – I don’t know what UNI is. Oh, U of Northern Iowa. Iowa has had a good year this year. I’ve actually heard them talked about on Twitter and then Chris Soules is from Iowa and he found love. It’s a great year for them.
Louisville vs. UC Irvine – Louisville. They won the whole thing a couple of years ago, so they’re probably decent. I mean, all the players have probably graduated, but the coaches are the same maybe?
Providence vs. Boise State/Dayton – Providence because they’re meant to win. (slide whistle)
Oklahoma vs. Albany – Oklahoma because they’re ranked much higher than Albany.
Michigan State vs. Georgia – Hm. I think Georgia. Just because they’re Southern.
Virginia vs. Belmont – Sorry, Belmont. It’s gonna be Virginia.
Duke vs. North Florida/Robert Morris – Definitely Duke. Sorry, Bobby Morris.
San Diego State vs. St. John’s – [Googles St John's] St. John’s is in Queens, NYC. On TV, people in NYC are always playing basketball. And then also one of the first results is a quote saying, “St. John’s is great at basketball!” So, there you have it.
Utah vs. S. F. Austin – What is S.F. Austin? [Googles] Oh, yes. Stephen F. Austin. Going with Utah because of the higher ranking.
Georgetown vs. Eastern Washington – Georgetown.
SMU vs. UCLA – I have to go with UCLA. Well, wait. SMU is ranked higher. Eh, UCLA.
Iowa State vs. UAB – Again, it’s a great year for Iowa.
Iowa vs. Davidson – How many schools are in Iowa? This is getting ridiculous. Iowa again.
Gonzaga vs. North Dakota State - Gonzaga, always. It’s so fun to say.
Kentucky vs. Purdue – Definitely Kentucky. My friends still have their Christmas trees up. It better be worth it.
West Virginia vs. Maryland – West Virginia, I think.
Butler vs. Notre Dame – Butler. They’re a basketball school. I mean, they seem to always be in this.
Wichita State vs. Kansas – The battle of the plains. Kansas.
Wisconsin vs. Oregon – Wisconsin, I guess. They’re ranked higher. I have no reason to pick Oregon, so might as well. Also, Wisconsin’s mascot is the Badger and I recently heard about a badger that held an entire hotel hostage, so they’re pretty fierce I guess.
Arkansas vs. North Carolina – North Carolina (blue).
Xavier vs. Baylor – I want to say Xavier because they’re usually here, but Baylor has also been here and they’re ranked higher. Plus, I always feel a bit of a kinship with Baylor because it was the other Baptist school (aside from Union dearest Union). Baylor.
VCU vs. Arizona – Hm, Arizona is ranked higher. Guess we’ll go with that.
Villanova vs. LSU – Villanova. It’s fun to say.
UNI vs. Louisville – I’m going with Louisville.
Providence vs. Oklahoma – I guess Oklahoma.
Georgia vs. Virginia – I think I have to go with Virginia. They’re ranked #2 and Georgia was already an upset to win the last round.
Duke vs. St. John’s – St. John’s, I like your story (that I made up), but I’m going to have to go with Duke.
Utah vs. Georgetown – Georgetown. They’re kind of known for basketball and I’m taking it as a sign that a commercial for Seinfeld was on while I was making this selection. #Costanza
UCLA vs. Iowa State – Iowa State. Someone on Twitter seemed pretty sure they’d win this one.
Iowa vs. Gonzaga – That same person was sure Iowa would win this one, but I’m going with Gonzaga because I like it.
Kentucky vs. West Virginia – Still Kentucky.
Butler vs. Kansas – Kansas because they have blue uniforms and they often win.
Wisconsin vs. North Carolina – North Carolina.
Baylor vs. Arkansas – You know what? Baylor.
Villanova vs. Louisville – Hm, I think Villanova. Because Zenon, Girl of the 21st Century, would probably say it as an exclamation.
Oklahoma vs. Virginia – Virginia, I guess. No real reason.
Duke vs. Georgetown – Duke. Blue, from North Carolina (North Carolina is good at basketball).
Iowa State vs. Gonzaga – I’m going with Iowa State. Just because of the fantastic year they’re having, according to at least one person on Twitter and The Bachelor franchise.
Kentucky vs. Kansas – I have to go with Kentucky, here.
North Carolina vs. Baylor – North Carolina.
Villanova vs. Virginia – I think Villanova.
Duke vs. Iowa State – Duke, because they’re always good. No matter what kind of year Iowa is having.
Kentucky vs. North Carolina – Kentucky.
Villanova vs. Duke – I think Villanova.
Now, you can’t copy my strategy exactly, though I know it will be tempting. You’ll have to get your own strategy. Feel free to base it loosely on mine. That’s why I do this. To help you.
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