1. I’d never do online dating.
2. Maybe if I’m old, like, 26 and still haven’t found someone.
Okay, maybe like 28.
3. I am 29 now. Still single.
4. I guess it’s not that weird. A few of my friends have found their husbands that way.
5. I still don’t want to do it.
6. It’s just so expensive.
7. Okay, I guess it’s the same price as Netflix.
8. I don’t want to watch Netflix alone forever.
9. Why can’t one of my friends just set me up with someone?
10. There are no single guys. None.
12. I guess there’s no harm in seeing my matches for free.
13. Filling out this profile is kind of fun.
14. How do I convey that I’m passionate about my faith and passionate about being funny without just saying that in the most boring and un-passionate way possible?
15. Crap. There are no recent flattering pictures of me. Why did I get this haircut?
16. Okay, I can always change my profile later.
17. Oh, look, I have matches. There are single guys!
18. I can’t see the full profiles without paying…
19. [emails saying matches are wanting to hear from you] That was quick. Maybe online dating does work!
20. I guess I’ll pay the stupid fee.
22. I’ve made a terrible mistake.